We returned home from China with Caden on Nov. 20, 2010. In January I was looking on CCAI's website which I never do.....and I fell in love with this beautiful boy. My heart was already connected. I prayed to God realizing this was not logical, and wondering myself...What am I doing? And how in the world am I going to convince my dear husband. I requested his file, and later my SIL told me "they just put him on there." I began preparing my husband by showing him videos and together our hearts break. So, the next day I sprung the news on him, and Yes, he thought I'd lost my mind because 1. this is our 5th child and 2. we just got home from China with our son. Needless to say, I shed A LOT of tears that week, NO SLEEP that week, and A LOT of prayer! The last day my husband took the file with him to work...And this was my prayer..."God, if it is meant for us to have this child then change Josh's heart and mind; and if it is not then please help me to get over him, let him go, and move on." Well, when Josh got home that day, I anxiously wanted an answer. So he said "YES!" Well, he really said email the lady at CCAI and tell her OK lol.
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